The Luck of the Jews

Another Borscht Belt-style yuck from Capettawitz:

The Good Luck of the Jews

Abe and Esther are flying to Australia for a two week vacation to celebrate their 40th anniversary. Suddenly, over the public address system, the Captain announces,

“Ladies and Gentlemen, I am afraid I have some very bad news. Our engines have ceased functioning and we will attempt an emergency landing. Luckily, I see an uncharted island below us and we should be able to land on the beach. However, the odds are that we will may never be rescued and will have to live on the island for the rest of our lives”.

Thanks to the skill of the flight crew, the plane lands safely on the island.

An hour later Abe turns to his wife and asks,

“Esther, did we pay our charity pledge check to Beth Shalom Synagogue yet?”

“No, sweetheart,” she responds.

Abe, still shaken from the crash landing, then asks,

“Esther, did we pay our United Jewish Appeal pledge?

“Oy, no! I’m sorry. I forgot to send the check,” she says.

“One last thing, Esther. Did you remember to send a check for the Synagogue Building Fund this month,” he asks?

“Oy, forgive me, Abie,” begged Esther.

“I didn’t send that one, either..”

Abe grabs her and gives her the biggest kiss in 40 years.

Esther pulls away and asks him,

“So, why did you kiss me?”

Abe answers,

“They’ll find us.”


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Alan

Alan Klein has three decades’ experience in being a leader in strategic communications at the vanguard of political and social change. Klein, a native New Yorker, was a founding member of the AIDS activist group ACT UP (AIDS Coalition to Unleash Power), and he co-founded the LGBT rights organization Queer Nation. By combining innovative digital and traditional communications strategies with headline-grabbing activist savvy, Klein obtains high-profile results for his clients. He served as the first national communications director and spokesperson for GLAAD, and played a pivotal role in Ellen DeGeneres’ coming out. Most recently, Klein helped to raise awareness of the plight of LGBT Russians suffering under Vladimir Putin’s regime, transforming a little-known injustice into a global controversy by securing national and international media coverage.